Last night I posted this on Facebook:
Someone was daring enough to ask what I do all day and I’d just love to share! This was a day with 2 rambunctious, busy and fun toddler boys who are 1.5 years apart! I woke to the noise of Roman peeing in my bathroom. He missed the toilet and got pee all over the wall, toilet seat, floor, etc. I jumped out of bed and stepped on a matchbox car. I ran over to Roman and couldn’t be mad because I am PROUD that my boy got out of bed (instead of peeing in it) and went to the bathroom all by himself. “Such a big boy!” I said… “But Roman. Mommy needs your pee to be in the water! Next time you pee, make sure your pee goes IN the water.” Its 6:30am, and I’m on my hands and knees using smelly cleaning products. I’m reaching behind the toilet at this time of day to clean pee off of my walls and floor; disgusting. Rocco screams from his room, “MOOOOMMY! I’M AWAAAAAAAAKE! COME AND GET MEEEEEEE!” Everyone is officially awake and the day has begun. Daddy is already off to work as usual and there’s never a slow start to my day. Ever.
“I want milk!” – “I want juice!” – “Mommy! I want french toast!” – “No! I want eggs and cheese!” – “Mommy! I want a squeeze yogurt!”
They dash downstairs and I hear the refrigerator open. I run behind them so that the whole refrigerator/freezer doesn’t fall apart in their attempt to start taking things out. They started fighting over cups, lids, straws, plates, forks, knives… “Guys! Seriously, don’t start. Let’s pick a cup and a lid and get some milk. Ok?” Roman’s ‘bear spoon’ is dirty and he wants it. Rocco wants the plate Roman used the night before and for the sake of arguing this early, I clean plates and utensils that were used the day before. Everyone was happy. Sometimes I have the energy to talk through the situation, teach and explain, but sometimes its just easier to not teach and just make everyone happy. I began to cook a home made breakfast: French Toast, freshly cut fruit, yogurt and milk for all! They are already racing. I serve breakfast within 10 minutes.
They sit for maybe 30 seconds before getting up and running to their toys. They squeal and scream because they want the same toy. “But we have two!” I say. “Go downstairs to your toy room and find the other one!” Roman throws a 2 year old fit… down on the ground. We talk, I train, I teach, I comfort. I walk downstairs with him hand in hand to find the other toy. “Thank You, Mommy.” (I feel good that I saved the moment.)
I come back upstairs to find that Beau peed by the door. OIY. More pee. We forgot to let him out in the morning dash for milk. I cleaned up the dog pee, let Beau outside and the boys fought over who got to hold the leash. We took turns, I fed the dog, cleaned up breakfast, and broke up another fight over God knows what. It was my turn to pee (finally) and I gracefully did so with 2 kids talking to me about life, climbing in the cabinets under the sink and washing their hands… while I peed. I begged for privacy and they ran into the family room and decided to build a fort with 57 pillows from around the house. How could I break up their fun even though they were making a mess? I struggle with that question every day… so many messes, constantly cleaning up. Fort building was keeping them busy. I haven’t yet sat for breakfast, haven’t had a sip of coffee or tea, the house is loud and its maybe 7:45am.
Rocco went into the bathroom for his morning pee. ”ROMAN! Come pee with me !” he shouts! Roman starts running. “Oh NO!” I shout back. I’m already yelling. “We don’t pee together or use the same toilet at the same time! Roman, give him privacy and wait your turn!” When Rocco is done, Roman went in behind him and locked the door from the inside and shuts it from the outside. “Time-Out!” I shout. (He knows better than that.) I bend a hanger and pick the lock. Rocco laughs at his baby brother. I talk to Rocco about the laughing when his brother does something he knows he shouldn’t then I talk to Roman when time-out is over. Train. Teach. Talk. Hug… This is a constant thing I do all day long and half of the time I feel like its not even working.
We attempt to get ready for the day. Today I need to get a morning shower. I have an appointment, a play-date and a toddler class to attend. “I have to make this quick” I thought to myself. The boys run wild upstairs, playing, shouting, fighting, wrestling… its a mess already. I can hear them while I scrub my body. Goodness, what could they be doing? I stay cool. “Hey guys!?! What are you doing out there? Everyone ok?” No one answers, then one comes running into the bathroom crying that the other one took his toy and ‘hid it’. We talk through the blurred shower door. I open the door a few times letting a gust of cold air into my warm shower giving me goosebumps from head to toe. I rinse and get out- I never get a long, hot shower. Never. Whatever.
When it was time to dress the boys, Roman argued with me about wearing the same ‘lawn-mower’ clothes… AGAIN & Rocco pulled mis-matched clothes down off of the hanger breaking 2 hangers. We talk about that. When I try to help them change clothes, they run and come back, run and come back. We talk about that. I try to keep calm but sometimes I feel all I do is yell and no one hears me. Now the 2nd floor is officially a mess but I have to get a snack/food bag together and we have to leave; its a busy day. I struggle that in moments like these, I can’t even teach them to clean up right after they play because we have to leave. I already feel like its 2pm.
We waited one hour for my appointment in the waiting room. Uncalled for. I was annoyed. I had to bribe my kids and be creative to keep busy. We did everything you can think of in the waiting room and ate all of the food we had. After Ring around the Rosie (on disgusting floors), Rocco asked a woman (who had a baby 8 days ago) why she put another baby in her belly. I tilt my head and had no words. Seriously? My head lowers and shoulders drop. “Mommy! But why does she have another baby in her belly? Are you going to put another baby in your belly after ours comes out?” I called him to me and quietly explained to him the ‘belly situation’ AFTER mommies have babies.
Roman’s class was successful, however, Rocco couldn’t participate and was calling my name every 3.5 seconds to let me know he was still on the bench. I kept telling myself, “Be Patient.” After the class, we took potty breaks and took off to a quick play-date at the park! Usually involving other kids in our day to day life is easier on me and gives me a moment to sit while the kids play. However, sometimes its just harder when you add more kids to a situation. Today it was harder as some of the other boys were rough and mean.
We went home for lunch and while they ate, I tried to clean up breakfast. The boys made annoying noises and giggled at each other over lunch. They chewed purposefully with their mouths open, Roman spit food out to get a laugh out of Rocco and their manners were poor. I stop and sit with them. This helps sometimes. Cleaning up from the morning rush can wait. We talked about manners. I gave examples. I am constantly teaching even when I feel they aren’t learning. They laugh when I show them how to sit and how to behave. Sometimes my examples get them even more wound up, other times they listen to me. Imagine that! I shove food down my throat and couldn’t even tell you what I ate. That’s typical for me.
During naps, I pay bills, answer emails, clean the house, unload/load dishwasher, do laundry, prep dinner and try to sit for a moment! Before I blink, everyone is up again. I start them on an art activity (its messy), we play legos (and fight over who picked up the red lego first), we read books, play board games (and they throw pieces when one loses); its time to go outside. I look at the clock and its 4:00. I think of all the wives/moms who’s husbands would probably be arriving home soon or within the hour. I don’t have a husband who works a 9-5pm job so I still have hours but its ok. We get cars and race them down the driveway. Its hot out, I’m sweating and I’m tired but in the midst of it all,
I love my job. I love my day. I love being the one to attempt to train my kids, teach my kids, and I’d have it no other way. I won’t complain about this even though I’ve been going strong for 10 hours by now.
I count my blessings while I watch our kids play and say a prayer to God that He would get me through the rest of my day and help me to be patient. I look at my iPhone calendar and I’m reminded that I have Open House at pre-school. Oh my word. Every day, at least once, I feel like I’m losing my head. I text Brian and he texts me back, “Babe. I’m gonna be late tonight. So sorry. Love You. Call you soon.” I look up and see Rocco pushing Roman. Lord knows what happened. I YELL. There goes my patience. Roman cries. I take Rocco inside to cool down. We all need to breathe right now.
I turned a television show on for the boys so I can cook dinner. This is the only time they watch tv all day and I don’t feel bad about it. Jake & Mickey. My sister-in-law said she’d graciously watch the kids during Open House which I attended and left early to pick them up and head home for the nights routine. When I put them both in the bath at the same time, I see tiny little pieces of poop in the water… someone didn’t wipe their bum completely. I’M DISGUSTED and say, “ARE YOU KIDDING ME? UNBELIEVABLE.” They are both starting to say that phrase now. I need to stop. I took a deep breath, drained the water and took them to my shower in which I washed them standing outside of the shower. I was soaked. They loved it. I was too tired to read them a book and sing a song but I pushed through because I love to keep their routine flowing. I made it quick.
For the first time all day, I walked slowly, breathed deeply, heard silence… dinner was still on the table but after a 14 hour day with 2 toddlers and a peanut in my belly, I proudly thought, I did it (again)! I loved it (again)! It exhausted me (again)! I wiped butts, cleaned human and dog pee, cooked 3 meals, broke up many fights, hopefully taught a lesson or two, spent some QT with my kids and and though I didn’t stop moving all day and never once took a break, life is good and I’ll do it all over again tomorrow… I didn’t eat any bon bons like some may think us sahm’s do, I didn’t sit on the phone, I didn’t catch up on the latest magazines… heck, who’s running for presidency? ; ) This is what I did all day.
If my day sounds anything like yours, I’m here to tell you to pat yourself on the back. Moms need to do that more often. We’re doing it! And to those whose day was crazier? That’s awesome! Great Job! We should all eat a Bon Bon.
How was your day?