Time to Poop, Mamas

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poop

YEP!  Show of hands, ladies…  Don’t tell me you’re one of those whose husband never does that?  If so, get off of this blog and bake him up a batch of cookies (and serve them to him in bed).  When I showed that card to Bri, we laughed together, smiled at each other… It was like, we both knew that’s something he does.  Every weekend.  When he needs a break.  But then it got me thinking… You know, it’s time for me to ‘poop’ too!  In fact, it’s time all of us mamas start pooping when our hubby’s are around and the kids are out of control.  Why not?

So, I tested the waters.

Last night, Mario was fussy and the boys were wild.  I told my dear hubby that I needed to poop.  There were no questions asked for having to take the baby and manage all 3.  It was quite amazing how he whisked our fussy baby from my arms and started walking around the house with him.  I walked to the bathroom, sneaking my laptop and iPhone in too and locked the door.  I’m not kidding.  I turned the fan on too and could barely hear Mario fussing.  What to do?  Yes, I seriously contemplated it.  I caught up on emails, booked a Matilda Jane Party at my place, scrolled Facebook, surfed Pinterest…

YUM

cookie

I texted a friend (or two).  I even read a short women’s devotion AND started next weeks ‘Meal Plan’- here’s Monday’s dinner!

I mean, do you have any clue what you can get done on the toilet seat lid in 10-15 minutes while all alone

in a locked bathroom with the fan on?

Try It.

Poop.”

I won’t tell.

I could’ve just went upstairs by myself… but we all know that doesn’t work.  And I could’ve left the house… but we all know sometimes that takes too much effort.  I could’ve even asked for some alone time.  HA!  You’re laughing too.  Here’s the best part!  When I came out, there were no questions asked, no conversations to be had… everyone knew where I was and everyone knows what goes on in there.  They just didn’t know my secret.

So I’m sharing it with you; we need to ‘poop’ more often.  On good days, on bad days… every day.  Yesterday wasn’t a bad day, I seriously just needed 10-15 minutes to myself without someone clinging to my leg, my arm, my boob, my body and/or asking me 7,942 questions that I don’t know how to answer.  Like, “How do garbage trucks work?” or “Why does the moon follow  the cars?”

It was so peaceful in my powder room; not one interruption.  Next step… I’m gonna stash a few candy-bars and a bottle of wine under the sink.

Baby steps mamas; baby steps.

Time to poop now.

(You’re Welcome.)

xo

 

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Comments

  1. Gretchen says:

    Haha I LOVE it! :)

  2. Laura says:

    Funniest most down to earth post. This made me laugh and realize how SMART you are. I am going to test these waters this weekend! Genius!

  3. Dana Tecza says:

    Haha! We always laugh because my husband CAN go in there for hours on end and no one bothers him. I go in the bathroom for literally ONE minute and there they are…. little fingers sticking through the crack under the door. Ugh!

  4. Julie says:

    I cannot stop laughing! I love this! You make me laugh my friend!

  5. I am literally LOL-ing right now! You are hilarious! I definitely texted my hubby that ecard. He knows it’s true too! I will be testing out your idea…we’ll see how it goes! ;) Have a great week, Angelique!

    ~Abby =)

  6. Jennifer says:

    This made me laugh! It is so true, I was just having this conversation w/my man yesterday! Lol… So yes, from now on I will be taking a nice long “potty” break everyday when he gets home from work! :-) I only have one child so I do feel a little guilty being in the bathroom for more than 20 mins or so, but you should take all the time you need! I say give yourself at least 45 mins at the very LEAST! “HAPPY POOPING!”

  7. Amanda says:

    Love this! And it’s sooo true. I do this sometimes too, I sneak off to the bathroom with my tablet. However, it never lasts too long because the children always find me and apparently they feel Daddy’s only use is to tell them where Mommy went….lol!

  8. Courtney B says:

    This rings really true in my household only we have extended it to “I’m going to take a bath” and we do… some days it’s him… some days it’s me. We have this large soaking tub and it’s beautiful… but you do have to lock the door or someone child will come a knocking but it’s become a mutual agreement to leave the other alone and that you can have your “bath” another day. Glad you figured out a way to get alone.. toilet and all :)

  9. Mindy says:

    Love this Angelique! And guess what? This “thing” that men do doesn’t end when the kids are grown…guess where Shep escapes to any time something needs done :-)

  10. Amanda says:

    Haha! I’ve seriously done that too! Without anything with me, just for the calm of being in there ALONE!!!!
    :) Amanda
    PS – I’m glad I’m not the only one who doesn’t know how to answer the “why does the moon/sun follow the car” question!!!

  11. Gina says:

    I’m going to have to get creative because I think my husband will know something is up if I’m in the bathroom for 10-15 min.
    I totally know what you are talking about though! I will definitely try it.

  12. Joanna says:

    So funny Angelique. And yes, I think I’m gonna try this on my man. The cookie bars — have mercy. They look so delish. Great post. =]

  13. Kellie says:

    I started laughing and I couldn’t stop! Then my husband ask me what was so funny. I couldn’t tell him, because that would give away what I have done so many times myself. The things you do, just to have a few minutes to yourself …LOL! It’s so nice to see someone else, not afraid to tell it like it is. I love it!! Love your blog too… you have a new fan…:)

    • Angelique says:

      hehe LOVE IT Kellie! Yeah, definitely don’t tell him ;) Thanks for reading and for the blog love too!

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